Anger Burger

For a long time I haven’t been into beef, with the exception of hamburgers.  No hot beef injections for this lady.  Even at the ubiquitous Los Angeles taco trucks I’ve fretted and groused and settled on chorizo, which tends to be made from pork parts that you wouldn’t discuss in polite company¹.

Predictably, my Vikinger half, Mike, needs regular red meat or his blood gets thin and he can no longer hear Odin’s call.  The red meat of choice around here is a flat iron steak marinated in a little soy sauce, a dash of worcestershire, a pinch of garlic powder and a healthy mountain of fresh black pepper.  Even Mike doesn’t eat too much, probably an ounce or two more than the recommended 6oz. serving, so even though we’re killing animals and destroying the environment we feel righteous.

Except, as I mentioned: I just haven’t been into it.  I do this sometimes, I stop enjoying a food for a while so I stop eating it.  When it is an expensive, unhealthy item like beef I figure I’m doing everyone a favor.  And then I read Smitten Kitchen’s post about steak sandwiches.

Now, this was when, back in February?  So for the last two months I’ve been thinking about steak sandwiches almost every day.  I’ve made a few (certainly none as photogenic as SK’s) and each time I think, this will be the time it no longer tastes so good to me.  And I’m wrong.

Yesterday turned into the Great Sandwich Marathon for reasons I can only attribute to my profound laziness.  Three sandwiches, three meals.  I didn’t even cook the steak, I came home from work and there it was, and it took little effort to smash it all into a hand-to-face delivery system.  Whereas Smitten Kitchen goes for a slather of dijonnaise and caramelized onion, mine is more often than not graced only with a thin layer of mayonnaise and a tongue-destroying quantity of the hottest, nastiest horseradish I can find.

Check out my hella soft white bread, bitches.

As much as I despise getting home from work at nearly midnight, a late-night steak sandwich that requires half-asleep flossing to get back out of my teeth has a predatory quality I enjoy.

***

Please note that I have updated the links page with list of my own personal observations about Crohn’s disease.

¹Since we’re not polite company, chorizo is usually made from: lymph nodes, lips, lungs, and salivary glands.  Its the salivary glands that crack me up every time.