Anger Burger

A few months ago I lamented the loss of innocence that Christopher’s Big Cherry brought me – I used to really like them,  but now find them intolerable.  Recently I came across a new one to me: the Chase’s Cherry Mash.

Problem one: hilarity.  The structure of the Cherry Mash is similar to the Big Cherry in that it’s a simple, solid puck of sugar, but the Cherry Mash somehow struck me more as, well, what’s the kindest way to put this?  Excrement?  There was also a clear, high note of cherry cough syrup wafting off the thing, which made for some conflicting emotions.

The interior was even worse.  A non-organic-looking cube of magenta fondant that again, wasn’t so much cherry candy scented as much as cough syrup scented.  Ultimately, it tastes exactly like it looks – pink and artificial.  The texture of the fondant was very dense and gritty, though more pleasantly cherry-flavored than it smelled.  Mostly it suffered from the same fate of the Big Cherry: too much sugar, not enough flavor.  The chocolate was too milky, the crushed peanuts too small and flavorless, the cherry too… not cherry.

I’m starting to suspect that failure tastes like cherry.